i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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