Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
