Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
