This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
