maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize