Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I think a kid would responsible me up
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
