Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We have so much sex to catch up on
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
