Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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