I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
