My nipple is on Facebook.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize