is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
try to milk me bitch
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
