I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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