The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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