you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
