I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
