My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
