Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
