my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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