..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
