Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
BRING THE BAGELS
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
