Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
