I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
