yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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