I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
