just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
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