It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Come see our sink grown plant.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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