He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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