East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'm like, not good at living.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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