i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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