She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
