I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
