I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
