it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
