I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize