I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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