you win again, gameday.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
