So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
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You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
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Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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