The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
