he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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