But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch