You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.