3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
