Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
