I'm so fucking centered right now
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
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you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
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im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
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