So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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