i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize