I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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