im gay
i know
yea but for you.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
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