the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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