He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
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I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
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