I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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