Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
We need to rekindle our bromance
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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