i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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